I came across this really interesting blog post. Read it here – Club Unicorn: In which I come out of the closet on our ten year anniversary. It’s an incredible story. I don’t know anything else about this couple besides this 1 blog post, but I like what I have read. I’m really impressed by how his parents handled him telling them that he was gay. I also agree with him that being gay is not a sin. It is only in homosexual actions that there is sin, not in the basic sense of just having the desires. There are various things I disagree with in the post, but overall it’s really good and thought provoking.
I think this post is one more little piece of proof that it is possible for us to deny and resist certain desires that are very strong in us, and yet we can still live fulfilling and even happy lives. I strongly advocate doing what is right even if it means my life will be full of suffering and unhappiness (though we won’t be without deep joy from Jesus in our hearts). But it is even nicer to read stories like this of people enjoying life when they are denying themselves to do what is right.
We don’t have to be controlled by homosexual desires (or crossdressing desires for that matter). They can be resisted. It does not have to be – “I have homosexual desires, therefore I must have a homosexual relationship in order to be myself and be happy, unless of course God completely takes away my desires.” This blog post shows the third option. Most likely God won’t just sweep away all of our sinful desires, such as homosexual desires. He will probably have to deal with them for the rest of his life. But in the meantime he is obeying God in this aspect of his life, and yet still enjoying life, and even marriage.
It’s interesting that he still finds sex with his spouse enjoyable. I can relate to that. I think a lot of sex is just the physical touch. It’s harder of course without the attraction, but surely certain ways of being touched feel good whether a man or a woman is touching you. And if you add to it the wonderful relationship of intimacy and trust and friendship he has with his wife, it makes perfect sense to me that he can enjoy sex even without the physical attraction.
On the one hand I want to say that this blog post is incredible. And yet I don’t think it is. It is incredible in the sense that we never usually hear stuff like this. But I must say it does not surprise me. In many ways it reminds me of my own marriage. If my wife and I didn’t care about doing the right thing, we would have divorced many times over a long time ago. But we stuck it out to obey God, and now we very much enjoy our life together. Further I resonate with this man in having improper desires that must be resisted. For him it is homosexual desires, and for me it is crossdressing desires. I fully believe his is the much more difficult struggle. But for both of us, we have had to learn to enjoy physical sexual time with our wife rather than giving in to the alternatives which we desire more.
As an aside, I disagree very strongly with many tenets of Mormonism. Although I think they have a significant portion of truth in their beliefs, there are enough basic belief differences to qualify it as a non-Christian religion or cult. It’s called a cult, not because it’s secretive and scary, no, it just means that it’s not a true Christian denomination. For 1 example they believe in multiple gods besides the one Triune God. I also disagree with what he says the Mormon church believes, that marriage has something to do with our eternal destiny. They believe that marriage is eternal, that husband and wife become gods and go on to populate another planet with their spiritual children. In Mormonism your eternal destiny somewhat hinges on whether you are married or single. But what I see as significant errors and problems of the Mormon faith doesn’t take away from the power of this couple’s story.