Practical Steps to kill a Porn or Internet Crossdressing Addiction

Here are 4 articles at porn-no-more.com that give really good concrete practical steps to kill a pornography addiction.  They are good steps at resisting temptations and triggers and steps for how to overcome the addiction.  If you are like me, you were not addicted to pornography but rather to crossdressing videos, pictures, and stories online.  Even though the issues are quite different in some ways, the nature of the sexual addiction is largely the same.  See my post on crossdressing is like pornography.  Therefore I’m sharing these articles to help all of us whether we struggle with pornography, crossdressing media online, or both

1. Create a Porn-Free Environment – This article is about limiting the easy accessibility of pornography in your home.

This tip – “Just get the stuff out. Box up tapes, DVD’s videos, CD;s, computer files and cable porn channels,” I would compare to the need to purge the female clothing in your house as well.  Purging gets a bad name as people say, “you’ll just go back to it later, and waste money.” While that might be true in some unfortunate cases, the same thing happens to alcoholics, drug addicts, and porn addicts.  And surely if those people were trying to quit their addictions we wouldn’t say, “oh but you’ll just go back to it later so don’t bother getting rid of the temptations.” That would be a ridiculous and an evil statement.  Not purging the crossdressing paraphernalia is like keeping a fire in your house and hoping it doesn’t burn you or the home.

This tip – “Change your e-mail address,” is important for crossdressers too, perhaps more important than for porn addicts.  So many people have signed up to my email prayer chain without changing their email addresses, thus still going by their female names.  They regret it later and they just end up changing their email address a little bit later.  But this is such an important transition to make in the recovery process.  How can you let go of the false identity you created if you continue to go by the name of that false identity?

This tip – “Display motivational photos on your computer.  Pictures of your family or a photo of your church or minister will do.  Pick any images that remind you of why you’re doing what you’re doing,” is a good one too.  In the case of crossdressers, I suggest finding a really good photo of you and your family.  But especially important is that you look good in the photo, as a man.  This will remind you of your real identity as a man and help you to be proud of that identity.

2. Get an Internet Filter Now! –  I have one friend who smartly has many features locked out on his smart phone.  To use certain websites and features, his wife has to be the one to deactivate the security program.  Only she has the code.

3. Dealing with those damn cravings – Of course as a Christian I advocate other tools and strategies for resisting temptations, besides those listed in the article, such a prayer, Scripture memorization, etc.  But the tips here are really helpful as well.

4. What to do when you want to quit porn – The first tip is about getting an accountability partner.  I have had several, but I have had one man keep me accountable consistently for about 10 years.  I don’t know what I would have done without accountability partners.  Without them, I’m sure I’d still be in the throes of addiction.

 

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4 comments on “Practical Steps to kill a Porn or Internet Crossdressing Addiction

  1. Snip says:

    I feel like I did these things, and each of them works to a certain extent for me. But combined, with the help of Jesus, I’m moving forward. I did not change my email, I just unsubscribed from the crap that came to my email. I deleted accounts at websites that were problematic. Then again, I didn’t have a female named email.

    I think these things go really nicely with your 12 steps.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. billylongtermcd says:

    Thorin this is helpful stuff,I agree with you that cding can lead to looking at pornography or certainly something very close to it inappropriate at the very least. When I have tried to suppress CD in my own strength and not God’s was when I started to look at porn the devil knows our weakness and if i was managing not to give in to cd he tempted me with porn and since the root of my problem was female underwear coupled to humiliation the stuff I was looking at was submissive / sissy men being humiliated by dominant men or sometimes women.you are right the longer and more you cd the deeper and darker it gets. I asked for prayer afew days ago and Paul and snip came back with encouragement and telling me they would pray for me.Paul said he asked himself do I love Jesus more than cd.This got me thinking about philipians 3v7-8 in New living translation “I once thought these things were valuable, but now I consider them worthless because of what Christ has done. Yes everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord for his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage,so that I could gain Christ ” the old av version says counting it all as dung -strong language but it has helped me to realise that cd is garbage rubbish dung darkness most seriously addictive and undoubtedly idolatry.1john 5 v21says “dear children keep from ANYTHING that MIGHT take God’s place in your hearts” there is no get out clause here “we must love the Lord our God with all our heart all our soul all mind and all our strength ” Back to Pauls question do i love Jesus more than I love cd -yes Jesus I do and with your help and my brothers prayers I can do it billy

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Alec says:

    These are good, practical ideas. After slipping for an entire month, it made me think of some other prevention ideas, if I may add these?
    First, definitely the idea of finding an accountability partner, this sounds like a sponsor in any type of 12 step addiction program. It surely can’t hurt as there is no way to beat this type of addiction alone, without help. If you are alone it is all the more difficult.
    Purging (sigh) is necessary as you say but as much as clothing and other articles cost it would be nice to be able to sell items, or donate instead of just tossing them away.
    Stay away from all the support groups, clubs, online and face to face. Everyone has their own agenda and opinions of what works and what doesn’t. The information one gets from these are worldly ideas, without any divine influence and of course all, 100% of them are going to tell you this is ok, normal, current, just you, etc…..
    My time out of the closet has proven this CDing is a form of sex addiction, along with other addictions; the feeling of craving, feeling infatuated, aroused, I know from experience, this is exactly what it felt like.
    Remember that the road to recovery takes help, it won’t happen overnight, it is about progress, not perfection. I’m doing somewhat better, still some withdrawal feelings after 9 days sober but no it’s one step, one day (and at times even one hour) at a time. I am reminded to come here, get involved in Sexaholics Anonymous, first when urges come back.
    Alec

    Like

  4. billylongtermcd says:

    Hi Alex can identity with what you are saying it is so hard on your own although I have followed this blog for the last year or so it is only recently I have commented on the blog. I am allready feeling the fellowship of prayer and intending to look for a 12 step program.regarding purging (and sadly I have to much experience of it) I ussually take clothing to charity shops.God bless you in your recovery I will pray for you now billy

    Like

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