Questions, Requests?

This page is a chance for you to ask me specific questions or suggest things for me to write about.  I’m not an expert, but I hope I have a few good things to say.  Just comment below.

I reserve the right to say “I don’t know”   🙂

*Please do not post your email in the body of the comment itself. It is important to protect yourself from spam and potential harassment by never publicly posting your personal information (such as your email address) on this or any other blog. Rest assured that I will keep your email address confidential.

191 comments on “Questions, Requests?

  1. CD wife says:

    Hello Thorin,Would you consider a section of your wonderful site for the wives of Cross Dressers to share their thoughts ? It may also help the Cross Dressers themselves to see it from the “other side” And i would hope you would be there for us as well.


  2. thorin25 says:

    CD wife, I would be glad to do that for you. Can you help me by telling me more what you have in mind? Do you want just another “page” with room for making comments? Since my wordpress site is a free one, I don’t have the ability to add a forum into my site. What do you think?


  3. CD wife says:

    Well i see your site as a forum really so a page where we can go to share would be very nice and for me your input would be most welcome and we could see how it goes. Thank you as always for your kindness and the good work you do.


  4. E says:

    Sarah, you’ve been on my heart & I’ve been praying for you since you commented. I am a wife that’s been married nearly a decade whose journey began similar to yours. Praying.


  5. Terry says:

    Hi again Sarah. Please realize one thing – the ONLY THING that will ultimately cure your husband (and any like him struggling with this pernicious issue) is the Word of God. That is your solution – that is, knowing it, meditating on it, expressing it, and standing upon its promises. No sincere Christian can continue long while engaged in sin. It just leaves you miserable, and trying rather unsuccessfully to bridge both worlds – which really isn’t possible at all.

    As painful as this whole thing is to you – realize that for His own purposes, God has allowed this to occur in your life. It is NOT some random happenstance, as if it slipped in accidentally without His knowledge. Therefore, I suggest trying to see this as a means of strengthening your faith – especially since you said that you had no idea how forcefully your marriage vows would so soon be tested. (I used to waste a LOT of time complaining, engaging in self pity, etc – over bad things that happened to me, seemingly by blind chance. That is just completely false. There is no chance, not with God involved.

    I encourage you to search the Word for certain promises, and then even forcefully stand upon them. For example, “draw nigh to God, and He will draw close to you.” Or “seek ye first (Matt 6:33). There have been many times in my life where I simply told the Lord, “OK, I did what your words says (as in Matt 6:33) – now you HAVE to meet this (legitimate) need (not a want). I did it your way – I sought you first. Another very wonderful promise that I could share with you later (one of my most awesome life experiences) was a dramatic fulfillment of Ps 37:4. I reminded the Lord about that one too. While this may sound arrogant – it is not at all, and here’s why. Did you ever read that verse – the Kingdom of heaven suffers violence, for the violent take it by force? Or how about this, perhaps a better example:

    Just imagine if you had a small child, and that little boy or girl came to you literally BEGGING you for food, or something to drink (as if you wouldn’t be inclined to give it to them). How would that make you, as a parent – feel? Terrible – right? The fact is, assuming we have a normal relationship with them, our children do not hesitate to come to us whenever they need anything and almost demand it – or rather, appropriate what they need from our kitchen or storehouse.

    Why is it that SO MANY Christians feel that have to beg when in prayer? Is He our heavenly Father, or isn’t He? Why then is it intemperate to appropriate what we NEED from the storehouse of heaven? Do you see what I mean? I am convinced that God WANTS us to take His word & His promises literally, and to hesitate, doubt or resort to begging is insulting to Him, besides showing no faith at all. So start living this experience with your heavenly Father, and EXPECT Him to act therein – and stop giving in to your fears, as if this problem will be like a millstone around your neck for the rest of your life. It won’t be. ONe of 2 things will happen. If your husband is a true believer, he will repent of this sin, at some point. Or, if he is simply a professing believer, he will refuse to give this up, and your marriage will come to an end – as the unbeliever will likely depart. So don’t lose hope. This is a test. Walk through it.

    Regarding wanting to talk to others, you should be able to e-mail some of the wives on this & other websites & talk with them. You also can post & read the responses. Many, such as myself, care.

    God bless,


  6. Sarah 2 says:

    Hello I have. Read you history old and new and I do understand why you want to remain anonymous. Can you share about how old you are and how long you have been free of your dressing.
    As the wife of an man who crossdressed and now is free of his dressing for over 2 decades. I find it refreshing that you are blogging about your experience.
    We found help from a christian man that helps CDs and there wives. We were lucky to find him and know god sent us to him. He would be a great help to you I am sure. God has changed my husband so much. I am sorry to read of your life with your wife many the sexless part of your marriage. I do get how some women dont want sex. I was that way to with my husband. That same man helped me and our love life is so wonderful now I thank god for this man coming to us. As god places people in your life for a reason. I wish you the best of luck and with god you can do all things. I know I have experienced it first hand.


  7. thorin25 says:

    Thank you Sarah. My marriage is much better now. We have struggles like everyone else, but we are content and doing great. I have been free from crossdressing (besides 1 quick relapse, and a few failures on the internet with fiction), since the beginning of this blog, back in Sep. 2011. But even long before that September, I had been fighting the addiction. I’ve been fighting it since highschool, but with less success than when I got serious about fighting it in 2011. The Christian life is a struggle against sin until Jesus comes back. We won’t be perfect now, but our lives should be characterized by sanctification and progress and repentance when we fail.

    I’m glad that you found someone who could help you and your husband. praise the Lord for the progress your marriage has made.


  8. E says:

    Thorin, Can we communicate via email? I have some questions.


  9. Alex says:


    I found your website late. Hopefully not too late that you can still talk.

    I would like to chat via email. Every single post I read, I seem to find myself in there. Reading your history and your about me, I kept thinking, that is me. It is as if I could have written this word for word. I am hoping to pick your brain on this topic.



  10. thorin25 says:

    Alex, i also invite you to join our support group –


  11. katelynn schneider says:


    i have a lot of questions and hope you can help me if i could have a few mins of your time i would be most grateful

    thank you


  12. thorin25 says:

    Sure I will email you Katelynn


  13. jas says:

    Hi thorn, we need some advice. My husband has an cross dressing addiction but he can’t stop. I have asked him to but when I think he has, he lies to me about it. This now effecting us emotionally, financialy and our there a number he cab call or someone he or I can talk to? We are seeing a marriage cousler and she sujested he gets personal cousiling. Please help.


  14. jas says:

    Thorn would you have a phone number or email it to me, my husband would like to talk to u. He wants some advice.


  15. thorin25 says:

    Hi Jas, I’m glad to help you, over email. I’m not a counselor, just a pastor and a fellow struggler with CD like your husband, though I’ve experienced great freedom from this addiction so may have a few things to suggest to help.

    I suggest your husband begin by reading some of my blog posts –
    They will give him new ideas about crossdressing that can help him as he considers whether to quit or not, some of the posts may help him to understand himself better, and if he does decide to quit, I have many posts about how to actually go about doing that.

    If he does want to quit, he can join our prayer group for accountability, advice and support.

    If your husband wants to email privately before joining our large group, then he can post here and let me know, that way I will get his email and will email him back, but no one else will be able to see his email address.

    Let me know how I can help, but please begin by reading more posts, that’s a great way to start!


  16. Vern Frapples says:

    Question. I’ve made a serious effort to stop crossdressing, by plain-flat disposing of my “things”. However, my male garb, spedcifically my underwear, has changed from what I wore long ago. Over the years I did away with the ‘whitey-tighty’ types and began wearing bikini (men’s), but in softer than cotton fabrics. I asked my wife (whom I using as an accountability partner) what I should do, “wear whitey-tighty’s again?” She said “why not?” Must I?

    Here goes an attempt to rationalize this….I’m not sexually aroused wearing the bikini, soft (even nylon!) and comfortable underwear. Is/would/could they promote or lead me to further walk the wrong path?

    And, I suppose I can surmise a possible answer: “and what do you think, Vern? Will it?”

    Your thoughts my friends – I anxiously await hearing what you think.


  17. Terry says:

    HI – I have faced the identical situation you’re talking about. I see nothing wrong with wearing comfortable underwear, and for me anyway, the “guideline” is – am I sexually aroused wearing them, or not? If aroused, then I should not wear them.

    Here’s the verse for you, I Cor 10:28. For some, it was against their conscience to eat meat, but not for others. Obviously, eating meat is a MINOR matter. I think it’s reasonable to conclude that the same applies in this case. There are some mens underwear (like bikinis, even nylon as you say) that are quite similar to womens underwear – but they are still mens. If your conscience allows you, then I think its ok.


  18. Andrew says:

    Hi guys, I have not been able to spend a lot of time here lately but in going through the posts today my heart is buoyed by seeing the questions, requests etc. that have been raised. When Thorin is not able to be here because of his schedule, I am more than happy to be a co-leader.
    All this to say WELCOME to you all and bless you for sharing.
    Vern, there is so much of what you have stated that I can identify with as in my past I struggled with what I will frankly refer to as trying to get close to the line without crossing it. Terry suggestion is fair and I will not judge anyone’s choice in underwear but for me, I had to see through the Holy Spirit convicting me that if it was male, made for a male etc. than it was ok for me. BUT I was also convicted that if I was defending MY right to wear what I wanted to my wife because of material, pattern etc. then the question became “Why are you holding on so tightly and why can’t you just let it go? If there is no “charge” on an item then great! but if that item was still reminding me of the past and capable of being a “trigger”, even if it was “male” I let it go.

    Personally, I prefer boxer shorts in a cotton blend because when I finally understood what I was doing, I realized that nylon and synthetics like “women’s wear” were actually hot and sweaty and stinky. Why do you think women went to cotton briefs, hipsters, etc? They knew better than we as they usually do! LOL

    Here is the thing Vern, you know what is right for you in your heart so quit looking for how far you can push the line out but rather concentrate on the desire to have a more vibrant relationship with the very God that cares so much about you that all He really wants is what is truly the “best” life that He has planned for you.

    Love you brothers, keep those cards and letters coming!


    Liked by 1 person

  19. lala says:

    what is crossdresser why some people doing this I like to as crossdresser how I can I do am 42


  20. vern frapples says:

    And that’s what I have been doing Andrew – working harder than ever on my relationship with a God who cares for the wretched soul I am. I have read some things and discovered a heart touched by His grace; I have listened to Him speak to me in ways of love I’ve never thought I could feel.

    I thank you for the responses. I hope some of my story might help someone as well.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. thorin25 says:

    lala, a crossdresser wears clothes meant for the opposite sex. It might sound like something fun to try, but it can become a very bad addiction.


  22. Dennis says:

    i tried purged many time over and over from guilt and shame jenner is going to be just like the rest regret I hope not but i know I am man i have five children but divorded after 21 years I love woman and evertihng about them taken out of man everyone has a little bit of male and female in em i guess is what I wanted to say and when we become one in marrage M to F Gods plane ya love and have as many kids as ya can as for sex better to be married easier some things you just cant stop I feel if a mans first organzm in panties slips is where all this stems from as for me every thing is a sin
    divorced transvestite who cant stop


  23. thorin25 says:

    Dennis, to be honest, I don’t fully understand everything you have written. But I am sorry for your pain and the divorce you have gone through. It is possible to stop crossdressing. There is freedom to be had. I encourage you to keep reading my blog posts about how to stop.


  24. River says:

    This article is referring to children, but I found it infinitely helpful in unlocking some underlying reasons for my own gender dysphoria.

    Also, this article helped me think of sexual desire differently. I don’t agree with a lot of Stanley Siegel’s approach but I’ve never heard anyone link past pain with sexual desire quite like this before.

    I’d love to hear your thoughts.



  25. thorin25 says:

    Hi River, I’ve actually done a blog post about the Siegel article – read the post and comments.

    In the other article about children, I have no doubt that what they talk about fits many children, but the parts about mother and father problems do not fit my own story.

    In the “other conflicts” portion of the article, many of those things did fit me.

    I think we need to find the hard balance in treating children displaying GID. On the one hand, you have to realize that the symptoms may be part of a larger psychological problem and the article mentions many possibilities, of how they might feel like they aren’t fitting in, etc. And so you would not want to exacerbate the gender problem but help them to be content in the gender they are and help them to enjoy gender typical activities. On the other hand, you have to allow them to be themselves, and be a boy who likes art, be a boy who isn’t rough and tumble. If you don’t allow them to do these things, then you suppress a part of their personality which I think could lead them to more severe GID and later a rejection of their true sex.

    Thanks for the links, I think I’ll share your first one in a blog post right now.


  26. E says:

    Hey Thorin,

    Thanks so much for sharing this awesome site with people who want to fight for God’s will in our lives. I’ve been in remission for almost 10 years (since I was 17), I never thought to seek help until recently (and really never delt with it – just compartmentalized it all till now). Recently after starting two reasonably successful businesses, the urges have come back. In my efforts to get counseling, it has only intensified and brought up the desire to try on women clothes. The urges range from just wanting to see what it feels like, to stress relief, to arousal. Also, I am married, my wife and I are both Christian – she knows about it and has supported me in turning to the Lord.. or trying it to see if it stops. Any resources you could refer me to on Phoenix AZ?


  27. thorin25 says:

    Yes E, thanks for the comment and encouragement! This whole blog is a resource. I encourage you to read through my old posts, and posts from guest authors, and the articles on my links page.

    There is lots to read. Don’t get overwhelmed. Just get started reading, and read what you have time for. It will be very helpful to you.

    I also suggest you consider joining our prayer and accountability group –


  28. E says:

    Thanks Thorin!!


  29. Matt says:

    Crossdressing is something that I dealt with as a teenager but it mostly went away for awhile but now it seems to be back at full force over the past few years. I came out and told my wife and we talked about it a little bit but we haven’t talked about it since August of last year or even brought up. I could tell she wasn’t happy about it.
    The past couple of months though I’ve been really struggling. I know it’s wrong and I know that I want to stop yet at the same time I think of opportunities to crossdressing and find as many times as possible to do it.
    I came across your blog shortly after coming clean to my wife and it’s good to know that there can be success at quiting.
    What I guess I’m getting at is I need prayer in helping to overcome this and any and all advice you can give me. I appreciate in advance for your help and am very thankful for this website.


  30. thorin25 says:

    Hi Matt, I am glad that God led you to this site. I and others here are glad to support you and pray for you.

    First, I encourage you to keep reading. See this page for all my blog posts. The ones near the top of each category are the ones that will be most helpful. Please feel free to comment and discuss individual posts and ideas.

    I also suggest that you join our prayer group for prayer support, encouragement, advice, and accountability if you want it.

    I will pray for you right now that God will bring more intimacy and healing in your marriage, that he will give you the resolve to quit crossdressing for good, that he will give you hope, and that he will draw you closer to Him.


  31. Snip says:

    Have you seen this?

    It just goes to show that we can’t search for happiness in the wrong places. A sex change wasn’t enough for him. Just thought you might want to make a post about this.


  32. thorin25 says:

    Hi Snip, thanks for the link. I don’t think I’ll do a blog post about it though. It’s very interesting and disturbing and very sad. This person has supposedly “found his true identity, his true self.” So sad. I’m careful about stories like this because they are radical outliers. Most transgender men are not like this. But it does show us the stark similarities in what people say when they rationalize their behavior. Similar to transabled people or people who claim they are other races. I would hope that some transgender people would see this article and think. I don’t want them to think we are claiming that they are all messed up like this. No. I would want them to see that the solution is to be content with who we really are, even if that takes work and counseling, rather than pursuing a false identity, even if it “feels right.”

    Doctors who do these kinds of surgeries for people like this are breaking the hippocratic oath and should lose their license. It’s just nasty.


  33. AK says:

    Hai ,I wanna ask that while struggling it is easy to discontinue for few days but it again comes back after 15 days to 1 month ,is it possible to avoid that
    Is it possible that I will be able to refrain from transgender websites


  34. Hey, y’all I would like to remind y’all to trust in God, with your whole heart or wholeheartedly, true there may be some urges that comes back with a vengeance but replace the “cross-dressing habit” with another hobby,or whatever you can think of to take more of your free time, away, for example: if you are retired, find classes based on what your major was in high school and college or if you haven’t gone to college go to college even at an old age. or replace the cd habit, with another habit, for me, since when i first succeed in beating my crossdressing habit, was replacing that habit with another habit, by buying clothes for my very far-off future children.(and I was only 21 yrs old when i succeed in beating my crossdressing I succeed in stopped either april of 2012 or august of 2012 not sure which month in 2012 but it was one of the “A” months which means it was either April 2012 or August 2012, I completely stopped crossdressing. And after i stopped i still had those urges, but i fought them off, with buyin’ clothes for my very far-off future children,if that didn’t work, play video games 24/7 or find a way to use the computer to your advantage, go fishing or replace your crossdressing habit with something similar to what i did. or something of the sort. And in Nov. of 2012, I fully accepted Jesus Christ as my lord and savior and asked him to help me stop crossdressing and asked him to forgive me for all of my sins(Past, present and future), and asked him to come into my heart and into my life and be my forever everlasting. And he still is my friend. And I haven’t crossdressed since Either April or August of 2012. So that nearly 4 yrs after I quitted that crossdressing habit. And I was baptized on April 28, 2013 at my local church in my home state.

    And remember this; this is how i stayed away from crossdressing,how you say, well think of the verses in the bible there are probably some forgivable ones and some unforgivable ones and some almost always unforgivable ones. meaning at one point they can be forgiven but after a certain point they can’t be forgiven which verses am i talking about is the verses Deuteronomy 22:5 and 1 Corinthians 6: 9-10:

    I’m in the midst of writing my autobiography or trying to think of a title that’s pretty much all i need is the title but can’t seem to think of one, and not sure if it’s too long of a title or too short of title. but my autobiography book will reference this website(just the website name as well as other websites and bible verse here is a sample of what y’all might read whenever i will get my autobiography book published.

    And remember this at one point in my life i was a crossdresser and while i was a crossdresser i thought at one point i might’ve been transgender which thankfully i wasn’t thank god. but now here’s the sample from my life story.

    And here’s the explanation from God himself that God himself gave me, The reason why was I going through the confusion of being born the wrong gender was to test me, and others to see if they were strong enough to resist the devils temptations or spiritual weaklings. Nobody is born the wrong gender, It’s the confusion the devil makes in you to think that way.
    Remember the story of Job (pronounced Jobe) and how the devil and God were arguing that the devil saying Job would forsake you the moment anything bad happened to him and therefore he would be the my (the devil’s child not your (God’s) child, god disagreed, but allowed the devil to test Job. And the devil made all kinds of things happen to Job, but Job didn’t forsake or blame God for the bad stuff that was happening to him. Instead Job stood his ground and stood strong in spiritual strength still living for God the Father.
    Back then that was a hard test, but nowadays anybody living in the 20th century and 21st century could pass that kind of test, so the devil had to improve his plans and God still allows the devil to test us to see how loyal we are to him (God) and to see how strong our will power and strength is.
    And, yes, The confusion the Transgenders and transsexuals feel is real confusion, but also a test of strength and loyalty and willpower in the lord is. To see if they could pass God’s test with flying colors or fail it miserably.
    And Yes, I agree it’s a cruel test, but necessary, if the devil confuses the child and they transition into the opposite gender (based on their genitalia) from which they were born as then they have failed God’s tests, but If they stand their ground and refuse to transition into the opposite gender then they have passed God the Father’s test with flying colors. Because once I realized that I was being deceived by the devil and once I got on the right side and passed God’s test with flying colors. God the father told me that it was a test to figure out what the devil’s plans were and are.
    What I learned while I was on the other side was, the devils way of thinking which was this thought “what better way to separate God from his children by confusing them into changing genders from what they were born as. Because if you say God does make mistakes and if the children’s transition into the opposite gender, then that’s like punching, and kicking your creator in the Face, Stomach and private parts altogether.

    I know this may seem hurtful, but this is what God the father, himself to me to say to y’all. This isn’t hate It’s concern for others afterlives and not their earthly lives. Yes, There is a catch or catches and here is one of the catches explained on page 26 or 27.
    Deuteronomy 22:5: “A man must not wear a woman’s garment and neither should a woman wear a man’s garment for all who do so are an “abomination” to your Lord Thy God. The word “man/men” applies to genetic (x-y chromosome) infant boys, boys, tween boys, teenage boys and adult men with “male” “reproductive” “systems”. And the word “woman/women applies to genetic (x-x chromosome) infant girls, girls, tween girls, teenage girls and adult women with “female” “reproductive” “systems.”
    1 Corinthians 6:9-10: says this: Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the Kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,
    Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners,shall inherit the kingdom of God.
    The word “nor” translate the last part of the verse to “shall not inherit the Kingdom of God.”
    Yes, I know what 1 Corinthians 6:11 which says this: “But ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God.

    The word effeminate in 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 applies to these kinds of people: cross-dressers, transvestites, Transgenders and transsexuals. And if you, people, believe that there is a gender spectrum then there is also a word spectrum as well, like using the word “effeminate” to describe cross-dressers, transvestites, Transgender and Transsexuals. Those were only a few examples of what the word “effeminate” describes. Look at the chart or charts in the back of the book to understand more.
    The words “shall not inherit” and “abomination” usually means unforgivable sins, but there are times in which the unforgivable sin can be forgiven. This is what 1 Corinthians 6:11 means, in order to be forgiven of the unforgivable sins, you’d have to fall into the first 2 Categories below:

    1st Category: If you haven’t fully accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior and haven’t been baptized=Breaking Deuteronomy 22:5 and 1 Corinthians 6:9-10=Forgivable Sin

    2nd Category: If you have fully accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, but haven’t been baptized=Breaking Deuteronomy 22:5 and 1 Corinthians 6:9-10=Forgivable Sin.

    3rd Category: If you have fully accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior and have been baptized=Breaking Deuteronomy 22:5 and 1 Corinthians 6:9-10=Completely and Utterly unforgivable sin. This category implies that you have fully accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior and asked him to forgive you for all of your sins (past, present and future) and asked him to come into your heart and into your lives and be your forever everlasting friend and also have already been baptized as well.

    Baptism only counts if it’s not forced upon you meaning that, if the church threatens to excommunicate you from the church if you don’t get baptized, the baptism doesn’t count or if you parents threaten to disown if you don’t get baptized, then the baptism doesn’t count. It has to be your choice and your choice only.

    the categories mentioned above explained when the verses are forgivable and when they are unforgivable as long as you haven’t been baptized then like in the 2nd category, if you have fully accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, but haven’t been baptized, and you fall victim to your crossdressing sin after that. then it can be forgiven again, but if you fall into the 3rd category and have been baptized then I’m sorry to say this you can’t be forgiven for breaking Deut. 22:5 and 1 Corinthians 6:9-10. because the baptism part is what the 1 Corinthians 6:11 implies usually. But this is what god tells me to say, you just have to ask god yourselves to see if the forgivable and unforgivable is real to you, but remember if you were forced to get baptized mention where the paragraph begins with “baptism only counts if it’s not forced upon you,” and that usually what it means but since i believe the Deuteronomy 22:5 and 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 is unforgivable only after you get baptized while other might believe it would also be unforgivable before you get baptized but i doubt that. I’m sorry to say this , but this is the truth.i believe you can choose to believe the forgivable or unforgivable parts for yourselves, but i believe in this, which is why i haven’t fell victim into the old ways and also pay attention to the items you buy online and offline in stores, and pay attention to your gifts as well, for example if it’s pajama pants it usually would or hopefully it would say “men’s sleepwear” but also pay attention to the numbers on sizes(if there are numbers) for this was from experience: when I was a cross-dresser, there were two shirts(1 in the men’s department and 1 in the juniors department) with the same exact design on them, but the size(m, l, xl)was nearly the same but the numbers were totally different, I was an xl back then and the xl in girl was written like this xl(16-18) while xl in mens were written like this xl(46-48), so as long as your clothes have double digits in the 40s or 50s it should be a man’s items.) and like i said before. I stopped crossdressing completely in april or august of 2012 and in november of 2012 I fully accepted Jesus Christ as my lord and savior and asked him to help me to stop crossdressing and forgive me for all of my sins,(past, present and future) and asked him to come into my heart and into my life and be my forever everlasting friend and he still is my friend and I was baptized at my local church in my home state. and after I was baptized my crossdressing urges went completely away and as long as you “fully” accept jesus christ as your lord and savior you should have enough strength in you to fight this temptations from the devil himself, but i didn’t tell my church this part of my life considering i was afraid i might have been excommunicated or something, and the threat about excommunication only applies if the deacons and pastors say it out loud. not in whisper and not after everyone leaves they will say it in the presence of the entire congregation. just so you know. that is when the threat of excommunication only applies had to make it clear. but i still gave a baptismal testimony without but i think it might have had in there but in a different kind of wording. or something like that i will leave a reply of my baptismal testimony here,probably later today considering it’s now June 7, 2016,at 1:12 am(EST/EDT) I’ll probably put my baptismal testimony on here probably around noon(12pm(EST/EDT) or later than that.


  35. thorin25 says:

    Casey thank you so much for your comment. I don’t have the time right now to dialogue with you on all the theological points you raised, though I have posted about some of those topics such as some of those Bible passages, forgiveness, salvation, grace, etc.

    Thank you for sharing your story as it is always helpful for other crossdressers to read stories like this to see that it is possible to quit.


  36. Hello, Thorin25: I’m in the midst of writing my autobiography and was wondering whether i could well, use some of the articles written here on this website in my autobiography book in the epilogue(in the back of the book), and was wondering what kind of copyright registration would i need to get my book accepted into having copyrighted protection and stuff, would i need a single application or a standard application because I’m not totally sure which is which, but i’m thinking i would need a standard considering i’m using someone else’s work and to be able to reference you i would need your real name hopefully. in order to get my book to be able to get copyright protection or can i just reference your website itself. without the need to reference anything except that i’m not the owner of the website but i’m going to guess i would need a standard copyright application in the first place anyways even if i’m just using the url only wouldn’t I, would i be able to use “thorin25 as your name in placement of your real name or would i have to use your real name so you can get credit for this stuff. or something of the sort. or how i would i go about getting my book to be able to get a copyrghted protection.


  37. Lisa says:

    Casey, congratulations. I am happy you beat your crossdressing habit. Praise God for giving you the strength. You seem very positive about your life now. Continued success to you.


  38. thorin25 says:

    Casey, You will have to look up copyright laws, and how to reference. But you can just use Thorin or Thorin25, and my blog address. Don’t copy and paste what I’ve written in my blog unless you do it all in quotes and make clear where you got it from. Then you’ll be okay. But try not to take quotes out of context whenever possible 🙂 Thanks

    Just think about any book you’ve read that cites and quotes other authors, and then gives the author and reference. You can do it the same way


  39. John Doe says:

    Hello Thorin. First of all, I can’t thank you enough for putting this website together. It has been a tremendous help to myself and many others. I am 18 years old and have struggled with crossdressing for as long as I remember.
    I think of my crossdressing as a result of OCD and anxiety. Although undiagnosed professionally, I deal with OCD and anxiety in some other somewhat severe forms. I have never felt out of place in my body as a man, I’m sexually attracted to girls, and crossdressing always just ends in masturbation. Yesterday, I was really stressed out about something and relapsed after two months free of CD, which was the longest I’ve gone in a while and was the first really concious effort I’ve made of stopping. Although I am dissapointed in myself for falling into temptation, I am trying not to dwell on the negative and I am just going to focus on taking it day by day like I have and avoiding situations that will lead me to crossdressing in the future. My main reason for making this post is to ask a question about something I haven’t see much about on your site. Is it common to have homosexual thoughts when dressed up? It’s like my whole mind changes and I have the thoughts of a woman when I’m dressed up. It’s more focused on doing what a woman would do during sex instead of focused on the actual man. I fantasize these thoughts only when masturbating while I CD and have watched CD porn and read some of those stories online in the past. I am trying to stop CDing now so I don’t take it any further and rot my brain with it and get to the point where I act these thoughts out in person. I never want to get to that point. When I am not dressed, I don’t have these thoughts and feel like my normal self attracted to girls. I watch and masturbate straight porn about 95% of the time (I know it’s sinful and not the answer but since I’m not married and don’t have a girl at the moment it has helped me stay away from CDing and looking at bad CD stuff online). Sometimes the thoughts seem to go in cycles, I won’t think about CDing for a week, and then it’ll come back for a few days and I’ll be really tempted and then it’ll go away for a few days again ect. In the end, I am sorry if I got a little explicit with what I typed but I don’t know how else to say it. My main question is just asking if these thoughts while dressed are common among other people that struggle with CDing. Thank you for the time that you put into this site, and helping people struggling with crossdressing like me. It gives me hope that I can beat it and overcome this sexual addiction.


  40. thorin25 says:

    John, thank you for the comment. Lots of good questions and thoughts there. I want to respond to each in order, though this will be a long response.

    First of all, as you are still struggling, please consider joining our prayer/support/accountability group –

    Second, I also am rather OCD and others before us have thought there is a connection between crossdressing and OCD. See this post –

    Third, we’ve all been there with failures. The key is knowing how to deal with failures the right way. None of us are going to live perfect lives. We will struggle with sin until Jesus comes back. But the question is whether we are truly growing, whether we are moving forward in the process of sanctification, whether we are putting such sins to death, and being in freedom from bondage to these sinful addictions. See these posts on dealing with your failure –

    Fourth, I actually have written a fair amount about homosexuality on this site, but not always in connection to crossdressing. I actually think sexuality is rather more fluid than people make it out to be, and especially for those of us crossdressers who already have an abnormal sexuality. It seems that if it’s abnormal in one way, it’s easy to change it in more ways. Go to any crossdressing fiction site and you’ll see the categories of the stories, they include such things as incest, age regression, spanking, homosexuality, changing into animals, sadism, masochism, rape, etc. It’s just nasty. But clearly there is a connection to homosexuality. Many heterosexual crossdressers who end up living as women and getting sex changes end up in relationships with men. I think most stay in love with women, but a fair number end up with men. It’s part of the whole crossdressing fantasy. They may not even love men, or be attracted to them, but being with a man romantically or even sexually helps them feel more like a real woman, thus turning them on, and making them enjoy it. For a post about the fluidity of sexuality and cd fiction –

    This book is an excellent resource and explores the connections and differences between homosexuality, transgenderism, and crossdressing.

    More blog posts that get at your question about crossdressing leading to homosexuality –

    I most definitely think that you can keep engaging in forms of crossdressing and crossdressing porn and teach your body to enjoy homosexual stuff more and more, even if initially you dislike it. We condition our bodies for good or ill. You have been conditioning it in the wrong direction.

    Fifth, that is certainly why you feel so good when looking at heterosexual pornography. You probably feel you are conditioning your body to desire what is right rather than what is twisted. In a way I agree with you, see this post –
    However, trading one horrible sinful addition for another is not a solution. Porn has millions if not billions of men in its grip in this world, and has destroyed millions of lives. Is it really a better alternative? In a way it is worse than crossdressing because it is lusting after real women, who are not yours. And many of them are sex trafficked. You are demeaning those women. Worse, you are in danger of Hell for doing so. So my word to you is STOP.

    Matthew 5 – 27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell.

    Allow yourself to be attracted to women, but don’t let yourself become addicted to this new form of sinful bondage to pornography. And let me tell you, they feed on one another. Any form of sexual addiction will make it very hard to stop giving in. Your body will get used to regular stimulation. the only real solution is to stop it all. If you keep giving in to porn, it will feed the sexual desire to CD, and vice versa. You have to condition your body to having wet dreams rather than daily masturbation. Masturbation is part of your addiction. You’ve just got to stop.

    Ok I’ve given you a lot to read. Keep in touch. I’ll pray for you right now


  41. John Doe says:

    Thorin, thank you for your well thought out response. I will take a look at the pages you suggested, and try to follow your advice the best I can. I will pray for you and everybody fighting this addiction. Again, thank you for all the work you put into this site. I can’t explain how much I appreciate it. God bless.


  42. John Doe says:

    One more thing that I wanted to add is that I’ve always watched straight porn since I started masturbating when I was 13, and then a few years later I started watching CD porn but I still would watch it spordically compared to how much I watched straight porn and I still do now. (Although I started dressing up in my mom’s clothes when I was very little and started masturbating in them when I was 13 also. Even before I knew what masturbating was I remember being a little kid and just putting the clothes on because they sexually aroused me) I know it doesn’t really change anything but I just wanted to clear that up. I think I have a porn addiction to go along with my CDing, so it is just another thing I will have to overcome and beat just like I will with CDing.


  43. Lisa says:

    John, you are being so honest and open about your addictions. Which must be so inspiring to others. I will pray for you. I know you can stop crossdressing.


  44. John Doe says:

    Thank you so much Lisa. I would like to ask Thorin about one more thing. I’m not sure if you know the answer to this but it’s worth a shot asking. I’ve been reading about transvestic fetishism lately and it sounds exactly like what I have. Most things say that it is usually sexual in nature during adolescence(which is how mine is right now) but as you get older it turns into a more of a thing that involves relaxation and comfort. Some things I have read have said that some tranvestic fetishists develop late onset gender dysphoria. Is this common? I have never felt out of place in my body and my crossdressing has always been purely sexual ever since I was very little and just put clothes on because they felt good even if I didn’t know it was sexual at the time. I’ve had anxiety about having these thoughts later in life. I really don’t want to develop gender dysphoria, or get a sex change or anything of that nature. It sounds truly awful to me. I know the best way to avoid this happening is stop stop crossdressing altogether which I am working on, but my main question is is developing gender dysphoria very common later in life for crossdressers that have never had those thoughts before? Thanks in advance


  45. thorin25 says:

    John I believe what you have read is accurate. The more you give in to a false identity, false reality, the more you become used to it, the more you become confused as to your real identity and the more you can’t imagine parting with that fantasy woman for lengths of time.

    Here are some posts and articles that might give you more light on it. I have written a lot about it on this blog if you read through my older posts also.


  46. Snip says:

    If I could get some prayer, that would be great. I haven’t struggled like this in a long time. Fighting temptations kept me up till almost 1 am this morning. I believe the only reason I got to sleep was that my wife prayed for me because they were back the moment I woke up.


  47. thorin25 says:

    I will pray for you right now Snip. Remind yourself why you wanted to resist temptations in the first place. Pray through it. Do something else to keep your mind off of it.


  48. Lisa says:

    Snip, your wife obviously loves you very much. Resist your temptations. Do it for her. I am praying for you.


  49. Snip says:

    Thank you Thorin and Lisa, along with anyone else that has prayed for me. I haven’t had to deal with an attack that strong ever before and knew it wouldn’t be that strong for long, but that doesn’t mean that in the moment I feel that way… The last time I acted out with my addiction was a couple of days before I got engaged to my wife. Lisa, you are correct that she lives me a lot, and I wouldn’t be the man I am today without her (I’m sure I’d be lost in the addiction to this day without her). I’m now past those hard temptations and feel pretty good, with some residual after effects trying to hang around. I’m still moving forward and can only praise my Saviour for it. I did a lot of praying, and then finally remembered to do the best thing I could: I chose to love my wife. When I was first overcoming, I would say that in my head any time I had a thought that I didn’t want anymore (100’s of times a day at first) that I love my wife. I hadn’t done that for several weeks as I hadn’t been struggling. I don’t intend to go back to my addiction as it doesn’t satisfy. I often ask myself if having shoes (ones that I just saw or am currently seeing) would bring happiness. The answer is a blatant no, and that really helps. Thank you for the strength via prayers.


  50. Thomas says:

    I have spent several days reviewing your responses to people who have asked you to respond to their posts about their cross dressing(CDing) selves and spouses. I have read the responses from loving wives too. I currently CD and have dressed completely for approximately 15 years. Before that, just underwear, shape ware etc. Before I proceed further, I need to tell you about myself.

    I am in my early 70’s. I was happily married to the love of my life for almost 50 years until the Lord took her home three years ago. My wife and I accepted Christ as our personal Lord and Savior–her, in her early teens and me in my early twenties. We both fervently believed the Gospel with all our hearts and I still do. Therefore, one would think I would be the last to be a CD.

    Early on in our marriage, she knew I was dressing in feminine under apparel and at times, reluctantly at first, she would shop for me and other times we would shop together. She knew I loved her and no one else and that I was not gay, nor was I inclined that way. We had an adopted son who now has a family of his own and does not know I dress. At first she did not want to be around me when I dressed but later it didn’t matter to her as long as I didn’t go outside or share my secret with others. I purged several times in the past, but about 6 years ago I got really convicted about my CDing (Deut 22:5 and I researched possible interpretations of that verse) and purged. We held a huge sale and disposed of all I had accumulated, repented and have regularly, daily, spent more and more time in His Word and this still goes on today. BUT, about 4 years ago she was diagnosed with a terminal illness, which caused us to become really close to each other–A year later she died. Everything worth living for was gone–my other half. I was OK for a short period of time until I had to dispose of all her clothing and that is when I returned to CDing. Not in her” clothes! I went out and bought a whole new wardrobe and everything else needed to dress and am still buying when I see something appealing. I dress my age. A note worth mentioning here: I had a membership in TriEss before she died and she attended meetings with me, I ended my membership when I purged but have since rejoined. TriEss, if you are not familiar with it, is a national organization for heterosexual cross dressers. I have struggled with the issue: “is it sin” is it not sin?” for a long time and have concluded that it is and that it has been forgiven. I serve Him as best I can, as often as I can, and as faithfully as I can. All my sins, past-present-and future have been forgiven. Yes, I confess the CDing every day and He is faithful and just to forgive me and separate my sin as far as east is from the west. He doesn’t remember it. I believe that with all my heart. But I still feel guilt! Not enough to stop because what else do I have?

    I fully dress at least one-two days a week in the privacy of my home. Occasionally, I will go out and get the mail while dressed. I have even fantasized going out shopping or just buying gas. Like most CDers admit, I, like them, get excited when dressed (even at my age). I enjoy the texture of the clothing and like some say “the relaxing feeling”. You say it’s a matter of self-control and His Word speaks to that too.

    Sometimes I just dress for the whole day without any sexual gratification because it just feels good to be dressed. I seem to be doing more and more of this. But, when I do gratify myself, I undress completely except for panties: two reasons–1) easier to pull pants up without unbuckling belt and unzipping and, 2) incontinence liners.

    Also, I do have a female companion, of several years, who knows I dress but has not seen me dressed en femme but I have told her she can if she wants too. She doesn’t seem to care but sometimes she is very inquisitive of what I do to get dressed and what is in my closet. She, too, is a born-again believer (saved). We are very close romantically, but marriage and sex, at our stage in life, is not possible(convictions we share, separate assets, hers and my grandkids and the like). I cannot have intercourse, even if I wanted to, because of certain medicines I take SO I rely on CDing to help me get to the physical need I want. I don’t drink or smoke and never have. Humanly speaking, I am a good man and I was a devoted husband and am a good father. I thought I would just throw this in. I also know that if my secret was found out, I could lose everything. What a dilemma.

    I guess, what I am trying to say is this: What else is there for me? I’m in my 70’s for goodness sake, I have no sexual relationship with any woman now mainly because I cannot physically do it, and yet I am told CDing is wrong, that I need to show self control. What about other vices: I am not into any of these: smoking, drunkenness, lying, stealing, divorce(remember, for better or worse commitment–yet in some of your correspondents women leave their CD husbands), cheating, adultery and a host of other sins humans do. In GOD’s eye sin is sin. I’ve been told–Man places different degrees on sins. I do see a conflict here. The one that Paul refers to in Romans 7:25 where “with my mind I serve the Law of God, but with the flesh the law of sin.” That’s me! and you!

    I don’t know. I feel like I am reaching out for an approval. It has been a part of my life for so long(since grade school when it started) it is so hard to stop. Addiction? Probably! I just wish I could live this part of my life out in the open. I hate all the secrecy, who’s gonna find out, what about my friends finding out, why does it have to be such a taboo, its just clothing, I don’t want to be a girl, I like being a man but, let me enjoy my “feminine side”? Additional note here that I picked up in one of your clients responses. I am in to crafts, feminine crafts, and women have often said to me “You are really in touch with your feminine side!” If they only knew!

    As I stated above, I have prayed, purged, stayed straight for years at a time but have returned to the “old vomit” big time! God help me!

    Just glad I’m,
    Still in Him


  51. thorin25 says:

    Thomas thanks for commenting and reaching out here. I feel your pain and your struggle, and sympathize with your rationalizations (i’ve been there with the same rationalizations), but you won’t find here the approval you seek.

    How could I approve? You yourself admit that you believe it is sinful. Sin is a big deal as it is, but we live under God’s grace. Unrepentant sin is a much bigger deal and is mutually exclusive to the Christian life. True Christians repent and try to stop sinning. I’m not making any pronouncement about you or your eternal destiny. My point is just that those who truly love Jesus, they are not perfect, they still sin, but they live a life of repentance and putting sin to death. If that repentance is absent in your life, that should give you some pause and caution. I mean Jesus said that adulterous thoughts put us in danger of the fires of hell. What about continuing daily in CD sin without real repentance? I mean read Hebrews 10:26-31. We are talking about purposely sinning every day in the face of the living God. Isn’t that trampling underfoot what Jesus did for you, acting like you are not really the new creation he has made you to be? (2 Cor 5:17).

    To be honest, based on what you have said, I don’t believe you have truly tried to quit. Maybe a few trial quitting periods here and there. But not really trying. If I offered you a million dollars today to quit, you could do so easily. Yet we are dealing with God’s will for our lives, which is a million times more important than a million dollars. Have you really tried to quit?
    Read these two posts, and then ask yourself if you really made a decision once and for all to quit?

    Thomas, again, I’m not saying you aren’t a true Christian, or aren’t truly in a relationship with Jesus with your sins forgiven. But I do know, that you are not living the life that Christ intends for his people. You are rationalizing sin. It’s one thing if you were convinced CD wasn’t sinful. The fact that you believe it is sinful is even worse, because you are doing so willingly every day against your consience, against what you believe your Lord and King wants, and just making weak excuses for yourself. You are living in sin, and spitting on the sacrifice Jesus made for you. The King has forgiven us for sin, but have we really experienced forgiveness if we turn around and blatantly purposefully disobey him every day? Is God your King or a figment of your imagination? If he is your King, how could you willfully keep disobeying him day after day without repentance and change?

    Do you need sexually arousal? No. There have been plenty of celibate people out there, with self control, plenty of monks throughout history. Self control is one of the fruits of the Holy Spirit. I have had to go without sex for long periods in my marriage, and it comes out at night in a wet dream. There is absolutely no reason we need to have sex or masturbate. That is just rationalizing sin.

    If you decide you really want to quit, and want to follow Christ in this matter, and be the man that he created you to be, instead of pretending to be something else, you are most warmly invited to our support/accountability/prayer group and we would love to help you quit.

    Praying that God would give you the resolve to obey him, and not make any more excuses. Life without bondage to CD is thousand times better in my opinion, all obedience and spiritual issues aside. It’s so great to be free, to be the man that God created me to be, to not run and hide in secret all the time, to be in fear of being found out, to be confused in my identity. There is also freedom and abundant life in doing what God wants us to do.

    I’m not going to tell you why CD is sinful. You know it already. If you have doubts, you can read tons of my posts on that subject, but for now, it’s time to do what is right. Stop playing games, come out of the fantasy, live real life.

    I think the Holy Spirit led you here, so that your life can change and that you can find freedom and true joy. Is it going to be hard to quit for real? yes. Will there be some withdrawal? yes. Can you actually do so? Yes. So many others have before you.

    Come and join us in real life as men


  52. tjw343 w says:

    HI all,

    I found a great Christian movie that I stumbled across accidentally on Netflix – and I didn’t even know what it was, and only watched it because it was 4 1/2 stars out of 5. The title is RAGAMUFFIN – and I like it because it is not only a very honest movie (in that the main character has some real problems) – but it is a TRUE STORY.

    THis is a rare christian movie that does not come across like a hallmark movie…I like it because while the main character really struggles with his stuff – and I can relate because of this pernicious issue that all of us write about…

    OH – the music is absolutely wonderful…

    There is a scene in the movie that I really like, which I copied below (wasn’t easy)…anyway…I think all will be blessed by this. Here is the part I copied:

    * * * * * * * * *

    Words by Brendan Manning…

    In the 43 years since I was first ambushed by Jesus, in the literally 1000s of hrs of prayer and meditation silence, solitude in those years. I am now utterly convinced – that on judgment day – the Lord Jesus will ask one question– and only one question:

    “Did you believe that I loved you, that I desired you – that I waited for you day after day, that I longed to hear the sound of your voice..?”

    The real believers will respond and say – “I believed in your love… and I tried to shape my life as a response to it.”

    But many of us who are so faithful in our ministry, and who are so practiced in our churchgoing are going to answer, “Well frankly no sir, I never really believed it” And there is the difference between the real believers, and the Nominal Christians that abound in our churches across our land. NO one can measure like a believer, the depth and intensity of God’s love, yet on the other hand – but then again,

    NO one can measure like a measure like a believer the effectiveness of our gloom our pessimism, our low self esteem, our self hatred and despair – that BLOCK Gods way to us. Do you see now why it’s so important to lay hold of this basic truth of our faith?

    Because you’re only going to be as big as your own concept of God.

    We make God in our own image – and he winds being as fussy and rude and narrow minded and judgmental and legalistic and unloving and unforgiving as we are.

    I’ve been in churches all over – and honest to God with so many Christians that I meet the God I meet is too small for me. Because He is NOT the God of the word…he is NOT the God that is revealed in and by Jesus Christ – who at this moment comes to your seat and says, I have a word for you…

    “I know your whole life story – I know every skeleton in your closet. I know every moment of sin and shame, dishonesty and degraded love that has darkened your past. Right now I know your shallow faith your feeble prayer life, your inconsistent discipleship…

    and My word to you is this – I dare you to trust that I love you -– just as you are- not as you should be – because none of us are as we should be…


  53. Thomas says:

    I have really meditated on what you said to me and I agree that I was seeking affirmation of what I am doing in my life. I have repented(I have big doubts that I can live up to my decision) and hopefully this time I will not return to the “vomit.” I have not dressed since my post and have not felt a need to. Let me clarify what I said earlier. I have repented before (turned away from CD’ing) and I know He forgave me (I stand on His promise of that), and I stayed away with no apparent desires UNTIL something triggered it and I backslid into it again. I told myself at those times and I still do “How can a just God keep forgiving me for the same sin over and over and over again?” My wife told me He will forgive me 70 x 7 times(“infinitely” was the message) but that I should not give up the fight. I guess, since she is gone, I had no one to remind me of that until I, by chance, I clicked on your site several days ago and got a reminder.

    I have “unsubscribed” to all those catalog sites where I got my “supplies” along with all those listed in my “favorites”. I know, that sounds superficial, but to me it is a start–something I can do now. I am not stupid about my past (as others who purged have shared here and under other columns on your site). I am not willing, at this time, to purge–too much experience with past purges and the “bookoo dollars” I spent on all that stuff and the replacement costs. I know this sounds like I have little faith in myself but my past has taught me. BUT, I will make it more difficult by removing the items to a place where it will take a lot more effort to get to them instead of putting them in my storage shed in my backyard–a storage unit across town that is not always easily accessible should give me time to “cool off” and have victory over urges. This will be a first of a kind try for me. When I get to the point where I no longer need or want them, I will donate to charity, etc. My goal is they never come back into my house. God forbid I ever bring them back. I am still a sinner by nature and still saved by His grace, but experience tells me that ridding me of this sin is not going to be easy–I know that!!! But I need to get serious about it and now is the time.

    Thank you for telling me what I really need to know (I knew it anyway) and what to expect–not sugar coated! I needed a wakeup call. Turning around and walking away from this sin won’t be easy–I know that. It was not easy before; but, with His help(the Word) and prayer, this time WILL BE DIFFERENT! Success!

    I will stay in touch with future posts.

    Still in Him, and know it!


  54. Thomas says:

    Casey Lee I have to disagree with one statement you said. I have always understood the unforgiveable sin being rejection of Christ as Savior, rejecting God’s gift, His Son. ALL other sins are forgivable.


  55. thorin25 says:

    Thomas great to hear! It’s not easy. I still struggle at times. It does get easier over time, but for most of us in this group, the urges never fully go away. (Though there are some guys who just don’t struggle at all with it anymore).

    For you, it’s going to be tougher than for some other guys. Just know that up front, and pray about it, and commit yourself to obedience even when it’s tough or involves suffering. Why will it be tougher for you? Besides having ingrained the addiction for so long, you also are used to regular sex with your wife, and then masturbation. It will be hard to change that pattern in your life. I don’t know how you feel about this, but if you think it’s impossible (it’s not) to stop having regular times of sexual stimulation, you could consider masturbating when the urges get too strong, masturbating without CD, and perhaps thinking of your departed wife. I don’t really want to recommend that as it could easily lead back to CD, or to masturbation addiction. It would be far better to just let it come out at night in wet dreams, but if you need a step by step process, you could try that.

    Good for you getting the clothes accross town. At least the fire is away from you, rather than sitting in your lap ready to burn you in your house. I understand the rationale about wasting money and purges. But I do think emotionally you are still tethered to this sin as long as you keep it there. It’s like a crack addict keeping the drugs in his house just in case he needs them. Well of course he will go back to the drugs as soon as the desires get intense. There is no way he wont. That is what addiction is about. That’s why people go to facilities where they can’t get access to anything and are virtually locked up until they get sober. So you keeping your stash readily available is like keeping access to drugs, so that you can calm yourself emotionally saying, “if it gets too tough, i’ll go back to the vomit.” And furthermore, you are basically telling yourself that you are not going to quit for real. Quitting involves as one of the first basic steps that you believe you have the ability to quit, because of the free will God has given to you, and because you know you want to stop and are committed to doing so. Until you get rid of those clothes there is a part of you you haven’t dealt with, that is not fully committed to stop. It is dangerous to not do the introspection necessary to make yourself 100% ready to quit this for good. DON’T give in to the lie that this is only just another false quit, and it’s a waste to purge. It’s not a waste, because you are not going to go back.

    I don’t think CD is the worst sin in the world. But is does keep people in bondage, and keeps us from being who God created us to be. It is confusion and it is addiction. I know we didn’t choose to have these feelings. But I do know that real life is not found there, and I do know that God does not approve of it. It is so very much worth it to stop.

    We live under God’s grace, and he is oh so merciful. Don’t I know it. Even after quitting for good, I have had too many times of failure. Thank you Lord Jesus for your grace, for me, for Thomas. You are so loving and merciful. Thank you for dying for us. Thank you for your deep patience with us.

    Don’t kid yourself that the secret to beating this is that somehow you won’t want to do it. For at least the first year, you can plan on just having to have self control not giving in to what you want, even though you do want CD, sometimes badly like a deep thirst. Think of it like a drug. You aren’t stopping because somehow the desire is going to go away right away. No. You have to resist, as you want it. Over time the desires will lessen and God will recondition you, and even your body will begin to want it less, and God will help you to be man and feel like a man. You will enjoy life so much more without CD over time. I’ve experienced all of that. But there are definitely going to be a lot of times where you want it, but still have to say “No.” and that’s tough. If the desires for it went away, then it would be easy.

    I invite you again to our prayer chain. Just post a comment there if you want to join and I’ll get you signed up. It’s hard to beat this on our own, we need accountability, we need people’s advice, we need people prayihng for us, we need to know that we aren’t alone, etc.

    I encourage you to keep reading my posts from past years, there are a lot of posts that could help you a lot!

    And articles to read –

    The more you think through this stuff, at least in my experience, the more you can stay firm on your resolve, find healing, and get this stuff out of your life. Understanding yourself better and understanding the nature of CD better really helps, thus why I think it’s good to spend some of your time each week reading more of the posts and articles. Just don’t let them pull you down a rabbit trail into sin.


  56. Thomas says:

    It is all gone and in a storage locker across town–EVERYTHING except several articles I found after my trip across town–I threw them away right now. I just wanted it out of my house for the first time in over 45 years. I’ve stored that stuff in the back of my truck, in my camper, in the attack and in my yard storage shed when I tried and failed before. It was still readily available, but not this time!! I feel real positive about moving it completely off any of my property. Yes, I know that the “drug” is still available BUT it will be a real inconvenience to go get it–plenty of time, I think, to reconsider an action to return to it.

    I paid for 6 months storage believing that if I don’t need it/or I don’t go get it/or I don’t go get even a little of it, I will probably have a garage sale or donate it to The Salvation Army thrift store in January. I know you don’t really like the idea of me having the “drug” available, I still think that I won’t go get it from there–I don’t like inconvenience of anything. I feel so good about making the break this time. I realized it was getting way out of hand–I was dressing almost every minute I was alone and I was neglecting favorite things I love to do (ie. arts and crafts, woodwork, painting, watching sports, etc).

    And, yes, I have really prayed that this change will ‘STICK’! I have repented, I’ve changed the direction of my life and I am depending on Him to see me through this trial. I have daily devotions every day(haven’t missed many days in last 5 years). Just want to share something about this. It was about 5 years ago that I sold all my “stuff” in a community garage sale BECAUSE I told a close Pastor friend that I had a sin in my life that plagued me. He told me I should fill the time that I did the sin with time in God’s Word–I did just that! And it worked for about 2 years until my wife died and I was devastated and all alone, but after she died is when I “fell off the wagon” and started to really get into CDing again. Strange thing tho, I kept up the daily devotions, felt conviction but continued CDing anyway. The thing you said that really caused this turning point was when you said I was “spitting in His face.” That grabbed my attention and forced me to see how awful I am and how far down I had fallen. The scripture in this mornings devotionals talked specifically to that and made me realize that He will be with me thru this and I believe more than ever before, it will be real this time.

    I will be in touch, needless to say. May the Lord Bless you richly!

    In Him, always


  57. thorin25 says:

    sounds good Thomas. You can do this. You’ve done it before. You just had a long series of failures that’s all. The Christian life involves a battle against sin that will not end until Jesus returns and makes us new. In the meantime, we repent, we live for Christ, we fail, we repent, we live for Christ, that’s just how it will go. But while we will not be perfect, it is fully possible to never crossdress again. You may sin in your mind, but it’s possible to never do this activity again. If you do fail again, don’t despair for your salvation, don’t rationalize like you did before and keep failing every day, just repent, thank God for his grace, and begin walking in holiness again.

    It’s good to have something to fill your time with, it sounds like you have a lot of things planned. I hope you don’t limit yourself to activities that you will do alone. It’s important that you get out around other people at least once a day. Staying home all alone all the time is a feeder for all kinds of private sin. Those hobbies you are going to do are great, but perhaps you can also volunteer your time somewhere to help others? I’m not saying this to make you feel guilty, it’s just a good practical strategy, and it will make you have more joy in your life to be doing so. Or you can use your hobbies to serve others, and interact with others.


  58. Thomas says:

    I am a little confused about signing up on the prayer chain. Do I use my existing email provider? Do I just use Thomas as my name? I understand I should not mention my email address in any of my responses. Please explain–I’m kinda computer illiterate to such things


  59. Snip says:


    I think it’s wonderful that you are talking stronger measures against this plague of sexual addiction. It took some drastic changes on my part to be where i am today with my own addiction. You can do it with Christ! I know that thorin usually contacts folks via email for the prayer chain. You may want to check your email. I’ll be praying for you. If you haven’t read much of this blog, I’d encourage it as I have been helped by this blog a lot.


  60. thorin25 says:

    Thomas, I have added you to the prayer chain using the email address that you used to comment here on the blog. And we are calling you Thomas, since that is the name you put here, better to use Thomas than your real name, just to be safe. If you check your email you will see instructions from me. Email me back if you have any trouble! If you want to create a new email address to use for the prayer chain, that’s fine too, just let me know.

    According to my records it looks like you successfully joined the prayer group using the email address I was referring to. Are you able to look at our different discussion topics?


  61. Snip says:


    Have you read Jeremiah 13 recently? I think it very much applies to CDing and other sexual perversions. Particularly verse 10 and 23 to the end.

    It pretty much states (to me) that those that walk in the imaginations of their hearts will be good for nothing.

    It reminds me of the verse in the New testament that states “where your heart is, there will your treasure be also”

    Maybe you have it in your helpful bible verses posts but thought I’d point it out.


  62. thorin25 says:

    Thanks Snip, I had actually noticed that passage before in relation to CD, but I haven’t written about it before. I’ll write it down for possibly writing about later. thanks


  63. cranmer says:

    Hi Thorin have you seen this? It’s a short new book tackling transgender issues from a Christian perspective by Vaughan Roberts, who is a great guy and a personal friend and former pastor of mine. His publishers have also provided a testimony from one former crossdresser who has found freedom in the gospel

    I’ve ordered the book but it hasn’t arrived yet


  64. thorin25 says:

    Thank you Cranmer, I really appreciate that. I will have to read that testimony more carefully and share it here. I will also add that book to the top of my reading list. Unfortunately I am just so incredibly busy lately with my real life ministry, that it might be a year or two before I finally read it. Which makes me really sad. But that is life. Keep sending good resources on as you find them. I save them and will get them posted here eventually


  65. Sunshine says:

    I am here looking for a lifeline. I found out my soon to be husband is a cross dresser. The man is my love, my soul mate. The dresser is not. I don’t know what to do. I have been crying for weeks now. I have been trying to find a support forum but no one will answer me at any of them.


  66. Snip says:

    Have you seen this?


  67. thorin25 says:

    Thanks for the link. I know of Walt and have linked to his sites, but i haven’t seen this video, I’ll try to watch it when I get some free time.


  68. Balin says:

    Hi Thorin,

    I first crossdressed at a very young age of 4-5 due to my curiosity of how female clothing (especially skirts and bras) feels like. When nobody was around, I would sneak into my parent’s room to grab one of my mum’s bra and then go to my younger sister’s room where I will grab one of her dresses. I would then lock myself up in my room where I will try on these attires in order to satiate my curiosity. Unfortunately, it soon became a weekly habit which I continued to do for about 3-4 months until I was caught red handed by my parents, my mum laughed it off but reprimanded me about it. Despite that, I would occasionally sneak into my parents bedroom to try on the bras every now and then.

    Fast forward to now and I still struggle with this bra wearing habit. It’s the only piece of female clothing that I like wearing. I did try full on crossdressing (privately) with corsets, wigs, make ups, dresses, and etc during my late teens in order to experiment with how it feels like to be in female clothing. Thankfukly, I felt repulsed after looking at myself in the mirror which led to me abandoning this experimentation for good. Unfortunately, the bra wearing habit didn’t go away. I continued wearing them on and off for a few hours every few months/weeks throughout my teens.

    I do admit that I get a bit aroused when putting on a bra but that eventually subsides after a few minutes. However, while wearing a bra I will feel more sensual and focused compared to normal. I also like how they feel on my chest wall since I have minor gynaecomastia (it runs in the family) and the added support means I don’t feel my manboobs (36A+) sagging whenever I sit down. Unfortunately, I have just developed an insatiable curiosity to experience what it’s like to have larger breasts which led to me purchasing and wearing breast forms in addition to bras. This breast form experiment is starting to get out of hand as I am now experiencing a greater degree of sexual excitement and remorse that I never experienced before wearing breast forms.

    I now feel quite conflicted over my actions, feeling quite guilty, remorseful and “dirty” at times. I am not trying to pass myself off as a female at all, I just want to experience a small part of their anatomy and clothing discreetly/privately while wearing my otherwise normal male clothes over them. I really don’t know what to do from here. I have tried examining the scriptures and looking around in a variety of forums about this issue of mine but I have not made any progress in knowing whether my actions are sinful or not. My conscience is bugging me and my mind is constantly shifting between the two sides of the coins about this issue. I am now in a state of analysis paralysis regarding this issue. No matter how much I try to give up this habit, I always keep coming back to it via thoughts or actions. Will really appreciate your input on this matter and what to do about it.


  69. thorin25 says:

    Balin, (nice name) – My advice? Put a stop to it. I believe what you are doing is messed up and sinful. But even if you didn’t want to take my word for it, clearly such actions are complicating your life, causing you shame, anxiety, guilt, and you have to go around trying to deceive people and keep this embarrassing activity a secret. What good could it possibly be doing in your life?

    Spend a few hours reading this post and the other posts that it links to –
    And then ask yourself whether what you are doing is good? Don’t take my word for it. Read these posts, think through my ideas, then analyze yourself and your motivations, and God’s Word, and see if you really think what you are doing is a good thing that is pleasing to God.

    Whether or not you crossdress completely is irrelevant. You are fixated on an article of clothing, addicted to wearing it, and getting sexual excitement from it. I sense that you already know the truth about what you are doing, and also knew what I was going to say. But maybe you just needed the added push to get you out of the “pink fog” as they say. Sometimes crossdressing and the comfort/pleasure it brings, even with all the shame and guilt, makes it really hard to think clearly and do what is right. That is what addiction is about.

    Make a decision to quit this addiction, then get the necessary help you need. If you do decide to quit and want more help from this community, you are warmly welcomed to join our prayer group –


  70. cranmer says:

    Hi Thorin a friend pointed me to this talk on gender and sexuality given by Rob and Claire Smith who lecture at Sydney Missionary and Bible College. It is very helpful in giving both an overview of the transgender movement, along with a Biblical perspective and appropriate pastoral response:


  71. thorin25 says:

    thanks! I’ll definitely add it to my list of websites and links I need to take a look at. I might not get to it for a while, but it looks helpful for sure


  72. Griff says:

    Hey Thorin,
    For about 10 years I hadn’t crossdressed, in fact I had avoided the thought in efforts/hopes that it would eventually diminish. I would pray and pray, and there were long pauses where I was completely not tempted. Now more recently after discussing my old problem w/ my wife she’s encouraged me to talk about and deal with the why’s. I’ve already explored quite a bit of your site and it’s been extremely helpful. Now however, in my attempts to deal with crossdressing it has become a very fresh wound even more aggressive than it once was. In 10 years I hadn’t explored it other than once with her (in our bedroom) where she asked me to try on her clothes (she’s smaller than me) and articulate what it made me feel like. I hadn’t ever taken it that far in the past, but I looked pretty silly. We still pursue both with a councilor and talking through my thoughts (not dressed as a woman) and praying together for the Lord to help provide insight and help put a stop to it. I’ve also pursued what it looks like to take care of myself better as a man, dress better, etc… About 2 months after my wife asked me to try on clothes, I couldn’t get it out of my mind. I’ve typically pointed my vivid imagination at business and music, but now I find my mind veering off weekly thinking about (but not pursuing) what it would be like to have clothes that fit, how much I’d enjoy the challenge to really look like a woman from makeup to an outfit, etc… Here’s the deal, I consciously know that pursuing it WILL NOT quench anything, and based off your articles and the articles I’ve read elsewhere it will likely only make things worse, especially since my mind is gear to work out kinks… it likely won’t stop till it’s fully satisfied with my goal. I’ve noticed in a playing field like Crossdressing it seems many a men are lost in that task. I still pray quite a bit both at times all-in and at times half-assed, to get rid of it. Like most people on here there’s some desire to get it completely out, but there’s also an urge to find a way to be validated and enabled. Let me preface this question with a quick statement, I work inside the church in a lot of different avenues, I’ve tried to confide in a few of my friends (who are pastors) and it has been quickly brushed to the side after they hear I’m making attempts to really deal with it. It was definitely not what I needed and in two cases, a little more shame. Are there any groups in Phoenix AZ or anywhere that you know of to help find counseling or accountability?


  73. thorin25 says:

    Griff, thank you for the post. It’s good to hear from you and that this site has been helpful to you.

    First of all, yes please treat crossdressing like a drug. It isn’t one of course. But it has the same kind of life cycle. There is no “end.” There is nothing that you can do “just enough” to satisfy that thirst, no matter how much it might feel that way right now. Were you to give in, you’ll just want to give in more, find more clothes, more looks. Were you to give in a bit, you might eventually want to give in full-time. There is no quenching that thirst, other than saying “NO” to it, until the desires subside a bit. It sucks, but that is the life of a Christian when it comes to sin. For all Christians I may add, until Jesus makes us new.

    That is really unfortunate what your wife did with you. She might have thought it would help you figure out more about yourself, but now it just fanned the flame of your temptations.

    I do think it is helpful to think more about the causes, underlying motivations, feelings inside, etc. And you’ve certainly seen me do a lot of that on this site. But don’t put too much stock in that. The Bible never tells us to look into the causes for our sinful desires, it just says they are from the sinful nature and we need to resist them and put them to death. Even after all my research, I still don’t know exactly why I developed these feelings and others didn’t. But what has been more helpful is seeing what needs I was trying to meet through crossdressing, and trying to meet them in other healthy ways instead to some extent.

    My point is, it can be a little bit helpful to analyze all of this more, but don’t do so to the point that it causes you to fail, like it already has been driving you crazy. Thinking about it too much isn’t good. And don’t think the struggle will suddenly become easy if you “figure yourself out.” It won’t. It’s hard, but again that is life.

    I don’t know of any groups in Arizona. Just check my links page and run through the organizations there and see what the closest ones are to you, though that list is not exhaustive either.

    I would recommend Prodigal ministries though they are far away from you.

    I would also recommend you join our prayer group and at least get some online encouragement and accountability –

    Put in your mind that you are going to start resisting again, even the thoughts, and go for another good 10 year stretch.


  74. Griff says:

    Hey Thorin,

    Thanks for the great advice, I have family that has struggled with addiction to narcotics and alcohol, and you’re right, my thoughts and reasoning when I “have the itch” is definitely like that of someone struggling from an addiction. It’s also refreshing to know that it’s very likely there there are issues in my life that i need to dive into (that may be enflaming a desire to crossdress – like stress, etc…), but trying to figure out where it started, and why it happened in the first place, may not help conquer the struggle.

    The last few weeks I’ve considered two really great thoughts that I feel like have helped me stand firm against this. (One thought, is a personal reflection and one is from the perspective of the Bible). I tried doing an extensive study into one scripture in particular to see if this might be something that would pass/fail what God wants us to think on:

    Philippians 4:8
     And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.

    I did my best to play “devils advocate” as I looked into the greek meanings of these words to see if Biblically God would give us a hall pass about thinking on crossdressing –

    True – ALETHES – “undeniably true in fact, what can’t be hidden”
    Honorable – SEMNOS – deeply respected because viewed as majestic (like a lion, or the ocean, etc…)
    Right – DIKAIOS – righteous, especially in the eyes of God, or in conformity with God’s own being.
    Pure – HAGNOS – ethically or ritually holy because of un-contamination, not mixed with guilt or anything condemnable.
    Lovely – PROSPHILES – pleasing, acceptable, grateful, worthy of personal affection
    Admirable – EUPHEMOS – well reported of, reputable.
    Excellent – ARETE – anything of eminent endowment, a quality.
    Worth of praise – EPANINOS – enthusiastic acknowledgement.

    True – CD, is definitely hiding who we are to be something else, even at it’s best we cannot change our DNA – FAIL

    Honorable – Definitely not in context, there’s nothing that makes people stand in awe when viewing even the prettiest crossdresser (the same way someone would if they looked at the power/beauty of the ocean, or the instincts and strength of a lion). However Playing devils advocate, to some pursuing what you desire regardless of what others think can be considered honorable thing to do for yourself. 50/50

    Right – I would have to say I don’t think CDing is confirming to what God created us to be, and thus not conforming to his will. FAIL

    Pure – I don’t see how we can pursue Crossdressing while maintaining an pure heart both to God and (if we’re married) to our spouse. I have found that I only get more confused, and isolated from both, even when I’m trying to justify and validate my feelings for CDing. FAIL

    Lovely – this can definitely be pleasing and lovely to some, but I’d have to imagine that even though God loves us, understands us, and completely covers us in his grace, the thought of altering the purpose he has for each of us in how he’s created us would have to be a sad to him. So – 50/50

    Admirable – I think this can go either way depending on who you’re talking to, some think pursuing this is very admirable, others do not. 50/50

    Excellent – You can strive to both do it with excellence and discipline. PASS

    Worthy of Praise – Since this is typically thought to be a self-benefiting act – meaning that most who pursue this do it because of their desire, not because of any type of sacrifice toward someone else… I would have to say FAIL.

    FAIL – 4
    PASS – 1
    50/50 – 3 (these cancel out)
    Total: 4 fail, 1 pass

    Psalms 1:1 shows us that what we meditate/think/dwell on bears fruit in our lives. I feel like I can conclude via this study that it doesn’t bear fruit that truly benefits us.

    Lastly, I was considering the idea that I should be open about anything I pursue in life, and whatever I pursue in life should advocate the things I love and believe in. So I considered if Crossdressing would benefit or bring the best out of 1. my relationship with God 2. My wife, and our relationship 3. my future children 4. would it honor my family 5. would it champion my work or responsibilities 6. my future

    1. No – this often causes me to come to the Lord less because of my shame, and knowledge that I can not pursue this and honor him at the same time (personally).
    2. No – this causes a lot of isolation from my wife, even though she’s the most understanding and loving person I know, I feel like this only hurts my desire to be intimate both physically and in sharing my heart with her.
    3. No – Even on it’s best day, I can only see Crossdressing playing into confusion in my future kids, which I do not like the idea of.
    4. No – (especially since most of them have struggled with substance abuse) I know my family wants the best for me and would find a way to be supportive if I did crossdress, but I don’t see how it would benefit or bring the best out of them.
    5. No – this would be a train wreck if I did this openly (meaning IF I pursued it, even being upfront with the fact that it was a factor in my life) unapologetically crossdressing would cause a lot of people to stumble and close the door on what I’m pursing with them in both business and church.
    6. No – Since the answer for 1-5 is no, I don’t see how it could be a benefit to the future of what I really want in life, and thus I can conclude that personally it’s not something I should entertain, but rather stay away from.

    Thanks for letting me share, feel free to delete this ramble. Long-story-short, your site has been a huge advocate to my personal fight against Crossdressing. Thanks again!


  75. thorin25 says:

    Thank you for the reflections Griff. It’s good for you to think about such things and process it, and probably good and helpful for others reading as well!


  76. Nosillasite says:



  77. Nosillasite says:

    Get back to me immediately.. I need help right away..


  78. Lisa says:

    Nosillasite. I hope everything is okay. Stay strong praying for you.


  79. CD wife says:

    What’s the the problem sweetie ? Can i be of help ? Deep breaths and the Serenity prayer always helps me XXXX


  80. CD wife says:

    Lisa i can’t find the earlier post can you copy and paste it again please ?


  81. thorin25 says:

    nosillasite, I’m here now, sorry I just saw your message now. What can we do to help? I emailed you also


  82. joeyjjbob says:

    Hi Thorin, wanted to ask what you thought about these responses I found online:

    I’ve been struggling for a long time and am starting to question whether it is okay to put on women’s clothes not out of idolatry, deception, etc but simply just for enjoyment and hanging about the house while I do stuff. I would like prayer in this matter. Please reply to my email as well and we can discuss privately there.


  83. thorin25 says:

    Joey I will email you as well. Thank you for the comment. I will pray for you that God guides you on this tough issue.

    I don’t want to retype everything I’ve written, so you’ll have to do some reading. If you want to know what I think about why crossdressing is both sinful and harmful, you can start with this post and the posts it links too –


  84. Miguel Angel Molina says:

    Hi Thorin,

    Greetings from Spain (Europe).

    First of all I would like to express my gratitude to have this space, and to be such an open-minded pastor that likes to open the debate and question all possible options. If all pastors were like you, our world would be much more advanced. One of the few things that really amazes me is that while Europe nowadays seems to be more developed in comparison to America, I’d like to confess that I feel spiritually, people in Europe has lost their path and have fell into Satan’s realm, while the old Christian Catholic institution does not provide a real supporting and helper network since it’s old-fashioned as it was a century ago. However, some of us started to wake up and are noticing we are in fact living in deceitful world run by evil. I was educated in Christian values by my family, specially my grand-mothers.

    When I was a teenager, I started becoming atheist, which made me felt really miserable as I was getting lost into the strings of evil, until half-year ago, when I realised all the lies and misery that are brought to this world by evil with the sole purpose to not embrace the divine heart of Christ to keep us away from Almighty Creator God. Although I cannot consider myself as “pure” Christian, since my research and studies of Kabbalah and other hidden knowledge books, which brought me to a higher awareness realm of our reality, I still do embrace Christianism as my preferred beliefs since it’s values resembles to a real balance for life.

    Now where I wanted to open the debate, is regarding what gender really means. God has shown me that we are no different to his eyes, and we are all his loved children on Earth. Why would God distinguish between men and women? if we look at it closely, it’s a duality. Like Romans said “divide and conquer”. And that’s the reflection on this World, a truly loving God wouldn’t create this conflict of interests between cisgender and non-binary roles, since at our sources, we are not divided by genders. Hence, genders are not a biological trait like sciences affirm, but a cultural one. Since we understand that the material world is the result of our consciousness and connection to God. This has even been proven by quantum physics (in general I tend to ignore science since it’s a huge delusion tool with the sole purpose of deceiving humanity. Not surprisingly Con/science it’s the opposite of the latter) which lead me to this turning point in my life. And what I found, is that God loves us no matter our condition, and only the distance from him can make us fell to evil.

    In addition to that, all the current despicable standard of living in the world is another aim in the satanic agenda of the rulers. Our mind and consciousness, it’s really powerful, specially if it’s connected to our creator. There are historic manuscripts from 1500 years ago, from Buddhist monks who were able to swift gender from male to female and viceversa being able to conceive in either way. The system offer you to shift gender by a Reassignment Surgery, which is nothing else but a mutilation of God’s temple, leaving some individuals who will live for the rest of their lives in the middle, not belonging neither to women nor men’s group, making them the perfect weak target for evil. So far, I’m trying to prove my theory of gender being a cultural trait. Since all our reality can be described as a vibration, I’m trying to use longer wavelengths for autohypnosis and if we place our intent on this higher vibration that resonates with our sacred souls, would bring God’s to Earth.

    Have you heard about Mandela Effect? It seems the demonic powers that are currently running the world have been able to defy God’s will and built a time machine to go past and many verses on the Bible have been changed, and a lot of pastors and people started to notice all over the World. Yes, somehow like “Back to the Future” movies, the Bible that was on your shelf has been changed, though you remember it differently. You may check the net for more information about it, but without going deeper to this topic, what I want to say is that we don’t know for sure how many times our Bible might have been changed it as well in past, and therefore, we don’t know if evil may have changed some verses in past in order to guide others into deception, while believing we are guiding them to God’s path.

    Apologies if my words may hurt your beliefs, but I feel compelled by God to share this. You’re truly brilliant as otherwise I wouldn’t have spent my time here writing this for you, and I can feel your genuine aim to help people. Just teaching people to hide all these CDing feelings since they are against God’s Will, won’t set them free. These feelings will be coming back in their lives all the time, and all of them will be experiencing deeper depressions every time.They will try to ignore it, but either they will have a larger transformation later on their lives (which is worse) or they will die regretting not have lived the life they wished. Oppression can never be fought with more oppression. Only Love can win. . I’m not saying that we should allow all kind of perversion to take place on Earth, but we must not forget that God’s teasing us here as well, in order to love and support our families and relatives that are going through all this process.

    In one of these visions-dreams I had where I discovered about gender, I was also shown that all this is happening since HOME (Help Our Mother Earth) is suffering, mainly due to all the excess of masculine forces that are ruling the World, killing our own brothers, practising cannibalism while assassinating other living beings perpetuating the cruelty and sins that are keeping us on this low vibrational realm.

    We are made at resemblance of God, we should look inside ourselves, where we can find the answers we need. Heaven it’s another term that has been corrupted over the centuries. Heaven is the dumping place we kicked out things we don’t need and limit us (stars, planets, and other astros, including Sun, which tries to blind us trying to switch off our inner lights that connects us to God and limiting us in a 24hr cycle). Earth is flat, and this is a biblical fact. Genesis defines really well our World. When I read the Bible, which I do often, I no longer try to get a literal meaning, but rather the essence of the symbolism which is placed there, and it works as an amazing tool for me. Like the apple being the deceit fruit which led humanhood to deception, as Isaac Newton fooled whole humanity with its gravity theories, while we are in free-falling between the eternal waters of the firmament.

    I don’t know if there will be after-life as such, I think we will only achieve immortality transcending alive from this plane. God gave us to their beloved children this planet, we must stop fighting and competing between us. I truly believe that all this turning female traits happening is in order to prevent us of self-destroying ourselves by so much oppression. Life is beautiful, and God knew it when he gave the ability to conceive children and the main external beauty to the body of woman, not of man. Women biology also makes them live longer. I am young (24 y.o.) and I have noticed that for some reason I didn’t develop my secondary male traits much even after being already mature, though my hormone levels were always alright. Now I understand what’s going on from the beginning, if I can or I am going to shift gender, I’d rather do it while I’m young and I can still get an identical body than of a born female, which is really difficult as the years weight on us.

    And I have also noticed that most of the folks that have a new narcissist conditioned invented recently as another disease called autogynephilia, can only be cured by love, support and understanding, teaching what is right and what’s not right, and helping them all address the right thoughts without making them punish themselves of feel guilty and dirty for it. All this is happening with the true awakening of all humanity. It doesn’t matter which religion you practice or where you come from. Only our love and faith on God can really save us. We’ve miserably failed all the times before fighting between us, while ignoring the real enemy which is dividing us.

    May God bless you all,


  85. thorin25 says:

    Miguel, thank you for the kind words about me as a pastor, and about my blog. Thank you for the comment as well.

    You’ve said so many different things about so many different topics. I don’t want to debate every comment that you have said, for there are too many. But I can tell you that we have very different worldviews and beliefs. It would be impossible to discuss and debate gender with you until we first discussed our worldviews in general. For you are looking to different places for truth than I am.

    I believe the Bible and God’s World both reveal truth about God and about us. Therefore I can look at the Bible to learn about sex and gender, and I can look at science to learn about sex and gender, and they are both sources of truth, from God.

    Since you have very different views about the Bible than I do, and since you do not trust science, we would not be able to agree on sex/gender issues.

    I will say that I agree with you that much of our expressions of gender are culturally conditioned, but I don’t think it is solely from culturally conditioning. Biologically men and women are very different, you can see that through common sense without reading a science textbook. Biblically, men and women were created by God, both in his image, both equal in dignity and value, but with different complementary bodies and roles.

    To take one very quick example, women can bear children, and men cannot. A biological scientific fact, one which surely shapes our sense of who we are as men, or as women, and our gender expressions. That’s not just culture.


  86. Miguel Angel Molina says:

    Hi Thorin,

    Thanks for you reply. Our views of the universe are not as different as they may seem when I tried to explained them. At the end, we both embrace God and stay away from all evil.

    As I had extended really much my previous message I would focus on the main highlights.

    Science is, and will be remembered be the largest delusion for the 21st century man. Future generations will be laughing about how we could be so damn stupid to believe that. We’re not floating in a outer space in a spinning ball nor we have evolved from monkeys That’s why there are so many missing links, yet we are “educated” (aka indoctrinated) into a belief system where we assumed them as authentic. When I realised that all Outer Space images we are shown are all CGI (Computer-Generated Images), and all evolution it’s also a lie (did you know that we’ve never found a full skeleton of a dinosaur, neither a full dinosaur skull?) I found out that in this case, this could only me that God created us, and that all our Scientific models are just made with the only purpose of hiding our creator.

    My main point on saying that Bible has been changed, is that on these times of darkness, where time-machines were used to go to past and change the Bible, now there are even some verses talking about unicorns… Another popular verse was changed from “The lion will lay down with the lamb” to “the wolf shall dwell with the lamb”. My point on this, is not to reject the Bible as our guide, but more to question, if this has been changed now, how do we know that it hasn’t been done before we know in order to keep us away from Almighty God? This is the main problem we must address.

    And regarding your comment, don’t you find Bible and Science mutually exclusive? Since the latter main purpose is to discredit the former one.


  87. thorin25 says:

    I do not find the Bible and science mutually exclusive at all. God inspired the Bible, God created the world, the two don’t contradict. Our understandings of either of them can be faulty, but they don’t contradict when understood correctly. You might not know that it was Christianity that spawned science. The best scientists and universities throughout history have all been Christian (and Muslim too I should add). Why? Because you can’t study the world and learn from it unless you believe there is a God who made it, and keeps it running in an orderly way. It is Christianity, in contrast to pagan religions, that believes the world and our bodies are good and worthy to be studied, not evil. It is Christianity, in contrast to Buddhism which says that the world is real and not an illusion, so we can study it.

    It is only in recent history that many scientists have become atheists and want to discredit the Bible. But the reverse is also true. I know of many stories of scientists who were atheists, but through their study of the world came to the conclusion that God must exist, as the only explanation for the science they were learning.

    To the rest of your comment. I simply disagree with you. I don’t believe all of those photos are CGI. And I don’t believe in time travel. And I don’t believe the Bible has been changed. I find it hard to believe that you think it is easier to believe in time travel than for you to believe that the earth is round.


  88. Miguel Angel Molina says:

    Thank you for your reply. I appreciate your comment and it’s full of meanings for me. My point of view on the world changed after some events, and like you, before I was appreciating a completely different prism of reality. After reading your comment I tried to project myself and emphasise with you, and seems I was able to see again this rounded world, which leads me to wonder, if we are constantly switching upon realities. Like if there were several realities clashing and only the observer’s will let him observe one or the another one, which ultimately makes the disturbance (Schoradinger’s cat & quantum physics) shaping the world however they wishes.

    I’ll keep following you. Thanks for your labour and good night!



  89. nosillasite says:

    Thorin, You know my story.. I’ve fought tooth and nail and need to stop the yo yo cycle. My husband has agreed to some type of bible study or something that will improve us as a couple.. please where do we begin? And yes, I am beginning to be more assertive now, letting go of FB friend, even temporarily letting go of FB, and not wasting any time anymore.. Any suggestions on where we begin?


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